It's Been a Long Time

So I think I blogged more before I had even graduated, then I have since graduation...which seems weird since this whole blog is supposed to cover the time between graduation and whenever I get back into school. So I'm back home. The first night was really depressing. I literally came home on Easter, went to my room and fell into a coma that was half exhaustion, half disappointment at being back where I started. I love my family, but I'd really hoped after college I wouldn't have to move back home. I got so used to the freedom of being away at school over the past 4 years that coming back to my parent's house...didn't seem like a great option. They're super super super strict. To the point where even by Junior year of college when I'd come home for breaks I had a curfew of 11:30 or 12 if I really pushed it. The last break I was home they accused me of drunk driving and threatened to take away my car because I had 1/2 a beer with lunch and then drove my sister somewhere at 8. I know half of their rules are the result of being protective and being concerned for me and my sister. I know if anything happened to either of us they'd never be able to forgive themselves...but the other part of the rules comes completely from control. I definitely am a control freak, and I give my parents credit for that, especially my dad. He's a complete control freak...and he can't help it. I know that, but I'd hoped that since I'd been away he would've gotten better...but he hasn't. He still checks my work schedule and basically monitors where I am at all times when I'm not at home. It's annoying, but I can't say anything to him or to my mom about it because I still live under their roof, they still pay for everything...and until I get out of here, I have to live by their invasive rules. Frustrating, but I guess I'm not the only one to ever feel this way.

I'm still getting the "aren't you relieved?" question from all of my friends who are still in school. They all say they're jealous that I'm done already...but I'd feel better about being "done," if I knew for sure that I was going back to school...because by the time September rolls around I'll already be itching to be back in school...in the words of Emerson, who I have STILL not gotten a decision from, I'll have to just "wait and see."

I am REALLY excited about all of my free reading time. Don't get me wrong, I was WAY interested in most of my literature classes because I got the chance to read novels I might not have read otherwise. I will always attribute my love of Dickens to English Novel when I got to read Great Expectations. I owe many of my literary loves to that class with Dr. Wilson. I love love LOVE Salman Rushdie, and even though Tristram Shandy was difficult to get into...it definitely made Midnight's Children much easier to read and understand. Since that class I've read Haroun and the Sea of Stories and I bought Satanic Verses, which admittedly I have not finished yet. Austen has always been one of my literary loves, but I definitely came to appreciate her differently through Austen with Dr. Burdan and later I developed an appreciation for her manuscripts and publishing experience through an independent study on her writing style. I'm reading Kindred by Octavia Butler, a writer I discovered in SciFi. In SciFi we read one of her Earthseed books, which I found preachy and annoying...but I like a lot of her short fiction and Kindred has been amazing so far. It's about a woman who travels back in time, without any control over when it happens, to the Civil War Era...and so far, amazing. I love Butler's grasp on science fiction elements in her work. I'm not a huge SciFi buff, but since that class I've read a LOT of scifi writers I respect. So even though being at home stinks...getting the chance to explore the different writers I've discovered makes it more bearable.

I sound like a super drama queen...I know, but seriously...I don't know anyone who's sincerely HAPPY to move back in with their parents and be unsure of when they'll get to leave again.

I also have WAY more ideas for short stories...which is weird, because usually I don't...but we'll see what happens with that. I mean, the time off could be good for not only my reading, but also my writing.

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