Where the Sidewalk Ends: Life After College

So I think I blogged more before I had even graduated, then I have since graduation...which seems weird since this whole blog is supposed to cover the time between graduation and whenever I get back into school. So I'm back home. The first night was really depressing. I literally came home on Easter, went to my room and fell into a coma that was half exhaustion, half disappointment at being back where I started. I love my family, but I'd really hoped after college I wouldn't have to move back home. I got so used to the freedom of being away at school over the past 4 years that coming back to my parent's house...didn't seem like a great option. They're super super super strict. To the point where even by Junior year of college when I'd come home for breaks I had a curfew of 11:30 or 12 if I really pushed it. The last break I was home they accused me of drunk driving and threatened to take away my car because I had 1/2 a beer with lunch and then drove my siste...

Whenever I write creatively, I face two major criticisms. The first, "You write beautifully, but do not always tell a story," and the second, "sometimes you need to know when to 'kill' your darlings." The second is one I am having a hard time with right now in the current piece I'm writing. I've changed the title multiple times...right now it's "Whiskey Confessions," or something like that...but it's still not done...and the problem is, I'm becoming unsure of how to fix it. I cut the half that interrupted the flow of the narrative and I've focused in more closely on the two characters, because I want to use omniscience. It was my goal this semester in fiction class to write a piece with omniscience, limited or complete, just omniscience. One problem I face is that my professor feels omniscience is "too much to attempt in a short story," but I don't agree. I've seen many short stories this semester that have...

This wasn't how I expected to feel. I thought the end of my senior year would be a breeze. I thought a weight would be lifted and I'd feel excitement for what was to come, but instead I feel hollow. I'm not excited about the future and I'm unsure of where I am going next. Yes, I have options, but doesn't everyone? We're all moving on from school and about to be thrust into the real world or back into school...that alone is an option...but recently my life has started to feel like one huge waiting list. Wait-listed for the school I want to go to, but probably can't afford even if I get in...offered a spot as an alternate for a program that a natural disaster has made nearly unfathomable...and looking forward to what? The bleak alternative of going back to Disney for another year? maybe another two? I'm sure most of the people who end up working at Disney for years didn't plan on being there that long. Unless you're upper management, and sometimes ...